I am the proud mother of three active boys. Two inherited my competitive gene. The other merely plays for the sake of the post-game snack. But, that doesn't bother me at all. My philosophy about organized sports is the children get exercise, learn group dynamics, and of course, better their skills at that particular sport. Notice I replaced the usual "team player" with "group dynamics." Team player implies someone "takes one"; while "dynamics" sounds more like leaders are being developed on and off the court/field. Well, during one of their many soccer games, it became obvious the other team was not much of a contest. Our coach put in the bench warmers. But to be honest, Dick Cheney and Hugh Hefner could have wiped these boys out! The crowd gave the coach a piece of their mind. I'm sure the members of the losing team must have gone through a spectrum of emotions: anger at themselves, anger at their teammates, anger at their opponents. I'm sure hearing their parents scream profanity at the coach and the zebra-clad villain, takes the defeat to another level. Ironically, the parents on our end were not sympathetic. They figured, "if they can't stand the heat get out the kitchen." I was really torn because I don't believe in all this politically correct, "everyone is a winner", nonsense. Someone has to lose. You can take the situation and practice harder or quit the team. At the same time, there's enough estrogen left in my household that I have some sense of empathy. Would I want to be that parent? Or better yet, would I want my child to be put in the position of that team?
Should the game have been stopped? Should the winning coach encourage his team to go softer on these guys? What is the sportsman code when getting spanked (that's a level beyond beat)?
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ReplyDeleteYolanda that's an awesome picture you have up how did you get that? (i wanted to post the infamous Phelps picture with my blog but i didn't know how) I agree with you that not everyone can be a winner and someone always has to lose. You dont say what age group these kids were but i believe anything at or below the highschool level should be less competitive, especially for the younger kids. When parents and coaches get serious and angry at a little league game its sending the wrong message to the kids, who should be playing for the fun of the game. They're not professional athletes, they're not making millions of dollars, so why do these people need to get so pissed off while watching young children play? I know this sounds corny but childhood is precious and a kid should be aloud to have fun without pressure while he still can, and the team should be able to dive into some pizza win or lose, because that was always my favorite part of the game too :P
ReplyDeleteI agree with both of you someone always has to win/lose a game. I do also think that young kids should be able to have fun at the same time though. In high school games you show no mercy, no matter how much you are winning by, a game is a game and they all count. Any coach I know puts in their bench warmers when they are up by enough, but all little league sports should be able to play all the kids no matter of their skill. Little league is supposed to be a learning experience for all kids and help them to get better not just to play the bad kids when there is no chance of losing. I do not agree that the parents and the coach should be flipping out because the kids should not have been exposed to that type of behavior when it is just a game (especially since it was evident that they were going to lose).
ReplyDeleteI agree with you all that someone always has to win/lose in competition. Sometimes losing by a huge amount can be as valuable or even more valuable of a learning experience than winning. Losing often time builds more character in competitors than winning does. Getting "spanked," however, can be demoralizing. I am not sure what I would do as the winning coach here. I would probably tell my kids to hold back a little and try not to run up the score. Maybe I would switch players to different positions that they may not normally play to help this happen and also to give the kids a chance to work o their skills at other positions and have some fun with it. It's always disappointing to see those parents in the stands who are "hot-deaded" screaming and kids and officials. These parents need to take a deep look inside and realize what message they are sending. I'm not saying don't be enthusiastic about your kids, but have some self-control people.
ReplyDeleteI do like your statement about sports and that someone has to lose/win everygame. I am too a very competitive person and I always wanted to win whatever the game that is going on. When I was younger and in sports I think the game should be based more on having fun and enjoying the game. When I got older and moved onto highschool sports I think that you should have sportsmanship. When my soccer team was killing a worse team, we would have to let up or go easy once we were up by 5 goals. By going easy I mean have to make 5 good passes before shooting and doing a cross with your left foot. Also we would go for the header goal. It does sound a little ridiculous but it made us work on skills that we normally wouldn't work on in a game experience.
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